Going to hell and back

So I had my first session of Bikram yoga yesterday. But before I get into that I'm gonna give my starting stats.
Height: 5'10
Weight: 182 lbs
Bust: 41
Waist: 32 (yikes)
Hips: 42

Yes this is hard to admit to by the way. But I'm trying to put myself out there be held accountable. So this is this start. Every week I'm going to take another round of pictures and measurements. Not only will I be practicing Bikram but I will be adjusting my eating habits as well.

Sooo my first Bikram session...... It was insane! I got to the place super early signed up and got a tour. The decor is nice it sets the mood for meditation and reflection for sure. I was feeling excited and peaceful, until she showed me to the room I'd be trapped in for the next 90 or so minutes. I was hit with a moist intense heat. I don't think I've ever been outside in 105 degree weather the thought of forcing myself to practice intense yoga in that kind of environment is daunting. I tucked my purse away in a cubby, laid my mat out and began to sweat.
Yes there I was laying quietly on a mat sweating my ass off and the work hadn't even begun. After an intense breathing exercise filled with ridiculous noises, we began our 2 sets of 26 poses.

In case your wondering no they are not all easy to do and when you add the heat some of them are down right impossible. Within the first pose I noticed sweat running down my legs. after 15 minutes I was officially soaked. Of course my immediate reaction was to feel embarrassed but as I looked around the room experienced yogis were sweating just as much as I was. After 30 minutes of poses I took my first break because the room began to appear darker and darker with each blink of my eye.... I was convinced I would pass out if I did not lay down. But the thing about laying down in that kind of heat and humidity is that it really doesn't help that much. I jumped in and out of poses for the following 40 minutes. I got hit by what they call "the yoga train" at 70 minutes all that I wanted to do was run away and never ever ever come back. I felt like I was going to puke and die in that room it was horrible and painful. And I just kept thinking these people have to be fucking insane to ever want to come back here. Instead of focusing on my breathing and whatever else your supposed to focus on in during yoga, my head filled with images of me breaking through the nearby window and breathing in fresh cool air.

But I didn't do that. I didn't run out I didn't give up even though I felt completely ill and miserable. Yes I didn't finish all 26 postures because frankly it's my first time and I'm not an idiot. I'm going to listen to my body do what I know I can do, I will push my body but not to the point of injury.

Walking out of that studio was the best feeling ever. It was cool and pleasant outside. The panic of dying a sweaty yoga induced death vanished. I felt proud and stronger than ever. After coming home I felt peaceful and in control and just really really great. Showering after that was amazing I've never sweat so much in my life. It was horrible and awesome at the same time.
This morning I woke up glowing and sore and slimmer. And I honestly can't wait to go back tomorrow.


Namaste

<3