Weeks 32 & 33

Holy crap I'm 33 weeks. It's insane actually typing that.

This week baby is as big as a....

Can you believe it folks? As big as a weird looking fruit?

She feels super long recently her feets are always hanging out in my ribs or on my stomach or what I imagine is my stomach. This week she's coordinated her breathing and sucking motions. She also keep her pretty little eyes open when she's awake now. D'awwww.

So week 32 & 33 were full of exhaustion and pain and itching.

Week 32 was pretty great it was a little painful and a lot stressful as it was my second baby shower which was mom and sister funded but I had a crap ton of work to do for it. Thanks to Aud and Katrina we got everything done. But I definitely over did myself on the days leading up to the shower. So I wasn't surprised that the day after the shower I was in a lot of pain and super tired.

That Monday I was pushing through the pain as was expected of me and going on with my normal day to day responsibilities. Tuesday I woke up in worse pain but I figured I just pulled my back out and kept going and going. That is until my body physically wouldn't let me. The pain was getting worse and worse and I finally couldn't even get out of bed. That night was a cycle of me being in pain and tolerating it for about an hour then crying for a half an hour then taking a hot bath then falling asleep for 30 min then starting all over again. My mom came over the next morning to help me with the pets. But being the person I am I still ended up doing my dishes and some straightening even though I was in excruciating pain. I had a 12:30 chiropractic appt that day and could not wait to get some relief from what I thought was maybe me "overdoing it." When Katrina called at 11:30 to ask how I was doing she noticed that I was bawling my eye balls out. So she offered to drive me and after refusing her a few times I finally accepted.

When I got to the chiropractor she wanted me to get my massage first to relieve my pain. Bad idea. It was one of my most painful experiences ever and I literally threw up on the table. Which was incredibly embarrassing. When it came to my adjustment Dr Rose felt how cold and shaky I was. She also noticed I was pale and texted my midwife. And they decided I should go to the hospital.

I am so thankful that someone recognized that I was seriously ill. I guess I got so used to pushing through the pain and brushing it off. So sick of annoying people with my complaints and questions that I ignored my own body and kept pushing through. Because hey I'm pregnant but all pregnant people deal with this so shut up and stop complaining and just do what has to be done. I had apparently lost the ability to advocate for myself.

I got wheeled up to triage and the first thing the nurse told me was, "I hate to break it to you, but back pain is a normal part of pregnancy. I had it, you have it and so does every other pregnant person ever." I listened to her tell me techniques to ease the "normal" back pain of pregnancy... And then there came the strong mama lion that had been pushed away by so many, too many dismissals by so many people who I don't even care about. "Excuse me I don't think you quite understand me. This pain is at a 9 or a 10. I may seem calm and collected because I am good about pain but on the inside I am in so much pain I can not stand it. And by the way have any of you even spoken to my Dr? The person who sent me here in the first place? Clearly she thinks that something serious is going on and I'm not just here because this is where I choose to spend my evenings." The nurse did not say anything again until she took my temp and realized that I had a 101.2 fever and that my heart rate was 150 and the baby's was 180+. "Oh looks like you and baby are tacky and have a fever. Maybe there is something going on here," she said and I wanted to punch her in her stupid bitch face.

I was admitted and didn't have to deal with that bitch again thankfully. The actual birthing staff was amazing and helpful and caring. But boy do those triage nurses suck. I mean really really suck.

Turned out I had a kidney infection. Which means that I also had a UTI for quite sometime that went unnoticed because I began to tell myself everything was normal normal normal. Because I let the opinions of others interfere with my well being, which I don't plan on doing again. So after 2 nights at the hospital I was released and sent home with antibiotics to finish up.

Moral of the story: fuck other people's opinions if you feel like something isn't right then something probably isn't right. And also that I need to slow down. I need to take care of myself and my baby girl better. It is extremely hard because Nick works soooo much and it sucks sooo bad that adding on extra for him to do when he comes home is horrible. My mom has been helping more which is amazing and I really appreciate but I have a really hard time excepting help. I feel like such a burden these days and I know it's not going to get any easier any time soon.

Despite all of the bad this week I am still thankful for my life. I have an amazing husband, a few totally awesome friends, a set of parents who want to see me happy, the most incredible sister to ever grace the planet and... The most important thing in my world, my growing happy active baby girl.

Some good moments...

Me and baby enjoyed the most delectable treat in the world together. 

Thinking about baby Arya and soon to be her best friend <3

Belly Pictures....

week 32

week 32

week 33

week 33

<3

29 Weeks Pregnant & Reflections

I'm 29 weeks pregnant! WOOoooOOOOOooo!

Baby is the size of a...

This week has been pretty good! I can tell baby is much bigger she must of had a big growth spurt over week 29. Her movements are big and sometimes painful but stinking adorable. This week shes mostly just working on plumping up in there and her body is making some big strides in brain development right now.

Oh and I don't have gestational diabetes! Yay! Look out doughnuts and cider! Which brings me to....

Fall is coming! What does that mean for me? That a lot of my time is going to be looking like this...

I attended Master's school orientation this week and came home pumped and excited about the insane work load that I have ahead of me. I really enjoyed meeting some class mates and hearing about how they got to where they are. I was surprised by a lot of things. I learned at the orientation that out of the whole entire Education Masters School I was 1 of 6 people who were first generation graduates. Out of about 120 students. That made me really proud knowing that I was one of the few who came from a home of GEDs and ended up getting into the masters program of my dreams.

It reminded me how far I've come, how hard I've worked and how much I deserve it. I should never doubt myself or my capabilities because I've made it. And I've done it all on my own. My parents didn't know anything about college or the process or really why anyone should/would want to go. I'm proud of my teenage self for deciding the kind of future I wanted and going for it. The whole academic journey was filled with moments of doubt and uncertainty. But I didn't rely on anyone but myself to figure it out. I'm really proud of myself and I'm really looking forward to once again proving how determined and successful I can be. And not to mention being a good example for my daughter and providing a great life for my family.

Fall is my absolute favorite time of year. I'm soooo happy my daughter is lucky enough to be a fall baby like her momma. September makes me super sentimental. I start thinking of all of the amazing memories I have from childhood and as an adult in the autumn. The cider mill, carving pumpkins, long walks in cozy sweaters and crunchy leaves, cuddling under a blanket with candles lit and a crisp cool breeze seeping in through the open windows. I could go on forever and I can't wait to experience all of these things with my little one.

This week I've been super emotional! It's kind of out of control I've cried every single day, for happy and sad things. Or just because I can't get the lid off of a jar.... It's kind of hilarious. I've had what I guess you might refer as heart burn except it's really not that uncomfortable I'll just randomly have vomit come up my throat and into my mouth. No warning, no heaving, no fuss, it just comes right up. It doesn't taste great but I'm getting used to being a big giant gross mess. As far as my SPD goes this week has had it's ups and downs. I'm starting to handle the pain way better and it seems like the chiropractor has helped a lot but I have some really rough moments.

As far as fitness goes I've been doing my "exercises" and cleaning that's pretty much as far as it goes. I actually didn't gain any weight this week which I'm super happy about. Last week felt like a huge jump in weight so it was nice to maintain for a week. My belly is getting big and kind of in the way now. It's hard to get in and out of some bathroom stalls, sometimes I bump it on furniture or people so that's new.

<3

Maternity Photos

Maternity Photos Round 1

These were taken during week 28 by my very talented little sister Katrina Soucy.

Thank you so much Katrina I absolutely love them and can't wait to take even more in a few more weeks!

27 Weeks Pregnant

I am 27 weeks pregnant! And baby is the size of a....

And I'm officially in the third trimester!!! It's one of the good things about this week. There is an end in sight and I can't wait to meet this little one. Also if she were to be born this week or next she has a 95 % chance of survival which is quite comforting for me. New this week... I experienced Braxton Hicks contractions! I didn't realize what they were while they were happening but my midwife confirmed them at my appointed.

This week Nick and I celebrated our 3 year wedding anniversary by dinning out at Roast. We got all dolled up, Nick enjoyed some cocktails and we both enjoyed the food. Although it's weird for me going somewhere and ordering a Filet Mignon medium it was still absolutely amazing. Here are some pictures we took with some really unique faces from Nick because he's sick of your pictures all looking the same....

This week her kicks have been big and her hiccups more frequent. Honestly having her in there doing stuff is insanely magical and awesome and makes me extremely happy. But I really can't wait to get her out of there.

As of this week my food aversions are back, but not as bad as they were in the fist trimester. My boobs also hurt something fierce again. And oddly I'm feeling bloated like I did at the very beginning. I'm gonna take a guess and say that it's probably because I've been much less mobile than I have throughout my entire pregnancy. Oh and here's why.....

It was confirmed this week that I'm suffering from SPD. SPD is a condition that is caused by a hormone that is naturally produced during pregnancy called relaxin. Everyone produces this hormone so that their pelvis/hips can properly separate when the time comes to push a baby out. People who suffer from SPD either produce to much relaxin or are too sensitive to the hormone. When this occurs your ligaments become much too relaxed in the pelvis area causing your bones to just kind of float around and rub against whatever they want and get completely out of whack. Which as you might guess causes quite a bit of pain and immobility. The good news is that most people who have this condition go back to normal right after birth or a few weeks after. The bad news is that I've still got potentially 13-15 weeks to go and there's virtually no treatment available.

As suggested I bought a support belt which tends to keep my pain level around a 5 or a 6 as opposed to a 7 or an 8 without it. Here's what is looks like...

And it's not very comfortable. It helps my pubic pain a bit but it feels really constricting and the baby absolutely hates it. When I put it on she usually kicks/punches it for 15 minutes or so.

So I started seeing a chiropractor Friday. I've been reading about the benefits of prenatal chiropractic care and I like what I hear. It is said to reduce the pain of labor, reduce the time spent in labor and reduce recovery time. Chiropractic care before birth also reduces your chances of needing medical intervention during birth. After two adjustments here's what I can say. The chiropractor makes every other part of my body feel better besides my pubic bone. So it's been nice not to have back, neck or shoulder pain. That's pretty amazing.

Back to my pity party. The pain and limited movements from SPD are driving me nuts. It hurts to even carry a laundry basket. And standing for longer than 10-15  minutes results in some serious pain. Walking hurts, stairs hurt, rolling over in bed hurts, getting of bed hurts, sitting on the toilet hurts, trying to put pants on hurts, you get the picture. The pain is starting to make me even more of an irritable hormonal preggo monster than I already was. And my house is spinning out of control but I pretty much only have it in me most days to clean maybe one room and the rest is just left to accumulate crap. I am so thankful to have a terribly understanding hard working husband. I could not imagine going through this pregnancy without him and I am insanely grateful.

Pregnancy fitness wise I am going to be getting much less fit as time goes on. I see my chiropractor/physical therapist wednesday so maybe they can give me some safe exercises to do. As of today I'm up a total of 21.3lbs and thankfully still no signs of stretch marks. And here's my belly this week...

<3

Cloth Diapering

Here is most of our newborn diaper stash. I say most because we are registered for diaper covers which will complete our newborn diaper stash and can also be used for quite some time after the newborn stage. 

So first why don't I address what's going on here in the first place. These are cloth diapers. Not your mom or your grandmas cloth diapers. Most cloth diapers are now designed to be comfortable for baby and convenient for parents. There are many different kinds of cloth diapers to choose from and I have a good chunk of them but there are others. For more information check out DiaperJungle.

Next you might ask, "why the hell would you use cloth diapers when there are disposable diapers available?" And for that question I have 3 answers and then 1 other reason that honestly doesn't matter to me as much as the others.

1. Cloth diapers are extraordinarily economical

If we did not have a baby registry and we bought all of the diapers/accessories ourselves we would end up spending approximately $500. An estimated cost of diapering a child from birth to 2 years old with disposables diapers is somewhere between $1500 - $2300, that does not include wipes or diaper creams ect.

2.  Cloth diapers do not contain harmful chemicals

Most cloth diapered babies never develop diaper rash! Plus here's an article about the lack of regulations and such on disposable diapers. Many of the absorbent gels they use in disposable diapers they wont even allow on feminine napkins (aka pads and tampons) if it's not allowed on my vagina I'm not okay with it being on baby girl's.

3. They're really stinkin cute

Okay not an amazing reason but I'm just being honest.

Oh and there's 4. The environmental impact of disposable diapers. I don't want to contribute to the world turning into the trash ball featured in Idiocracy.

Also this.

Because it's funny and it's one of the reasons why we decided to reproduce.

Onto the stuff!

My newborn stash will fit baby from 5lbs to between 16&18lbs depending on the diaper. But by that time she should fit into her Onesize diapers which I'll talk more about in another post. We have pocket diapers, all in one diapers, fitted diapers, prefolds and soon diaper covers.

In addition to cloth diapers we will also be using cloth wipes which in my experience work sooooo much better than disposable wipes.

Here are all of the diapers listed from least expensive to most. 

Prefold diapers will be used with a Snappi to hold them in place and then a cover ontop.The ones I picked up are GMD Clothe-eez and are made of unbleached cotton.

Here's what they look like before washing and after 6 washes. And then an example of a Snappi.

I wanted to have a few kissaluvs newborn fitted diapers because they're supposed to be super absorbent, trim and practically leak proof.

I love the low rise for the umbilical stump as well.

Next we have some size xs Fuzzibunz pocket diapers. These diapers resemble and work almost just like disposables. They do need to be stuffed with an insert and you can change which insert/how many inserts you use depending on your baby's needs. 

And finally some AIOs (all in one) which work exactly like a disposable diaper. There is no stuffing no folding. Some use velcro closures some use snaps. I wanted to try a few so I got a small variety.

Kissaluvs

Cotton fleece blend

Swaddlebees

Owl print with organic cotton inner

Thirsties 

These have 2 sizes to get maximum bang for your buck.

I would love to have an entire stash of AIOs because they are the easiest and they do have extra room to stuff if you absolutely need it. But AIOs are the most expensive diapering option. Having 24+ AIO for each stage would come close to defeating my reason #1.

And that is what baby girl's bum will be covered in from day 1. A lot of people think cloth diapering is crazy gross and weird. From my experience so far with friend's baby's it is none of those things. Cloth diapering is going to help keep money in the bank and my mind at ease. I have absolutely nothing against parents who choose disposable diapers for their babies, this is just my preference. If anyone is interested in cloth diapering their baby but has no idea where to start feel free to comment/message/call/text me! Not that I know everything about it because I don't. But I've been researching cloth since we decided to have a baby i know quite a bit but there's still a ton that I have to learn!