34 Weeks Pregnant

34 weeks! I feel so close to meeting her and I'm so excited!

Baby is as big as a....

Yes a Butternut Squash..

And I wouldn't be surprised if she was longer than one. Her head is way way low and her feet mostly reside in my rib cage :)

This week the baby can actually recognize songs that I play around her and react to them. Super neat! Also kind of gross: she's peeing about a pint a day all around herself! lol.

So in week 34 I got over my kidney infection. Yay! Nick and I focused pretty hard on getting the baby room ready. Buying all the stuff we didn't get from the showers and putting it together. There are a few tiny things that need to get done before I can post pictures of the nursery. But I just love it. It's my favorite room in the house and Nick worked so hard to make it perfect I feel so lucky that our daughter gets to be in such an amazing environment with so many cool things.

This week I had a weird pregnancy symptom (itching all over) so I ended up calling the Dr about it and I set up to have blood work this past Friday. It turns out my bile acids are elevated indicating that I have Cholestasis of Pregnancy. This effects aprox. 1 in 1000 pregnancies and is kind of scary. Basically what's happening is my liver is not functioning correctly. My body is producing bile and my liver can not process it so the extra bile stays in my blood stream and can move through the placenta to the baby. Baby's liver can not handle the bile so it can lead to some issues. Overall it's not super dangerous it just changes some things... I need to maintain a healthy low fat diet, I am no longer going to be able to have a natural occurring labor, I will have to be induced, I am not allowed to birth in the natural birthing suite that I had planned on, I am still seeing my midwives but start seeing a new ob in addition to them on Friday, I got for non stress tests twice a week as well as once a week blood draws, I get an ultrasound once per week starting Friday and baby girl will definitely be an October baby.

Not going to lie, this news has been rough. But I'm starting to realize that life does not give a shit about my plan and I need to accept that. I'm working on it. I want what is best for Arya. What's best for her would have been a normal pregnancy and a completely unmedicated natural birth. But under  these circumstances we are now considered high risk and I'm willing to do anything/go through anything to get her out and into our arms okay.

During my kidney infection my weight jumped up pretty high, but it has dropped back down. I was really swollen during that time so I'm guessing it was just water weight. My total pregnancy weight gain so far is 32lbs. I haven't been exercising much at all except for cleaning my house and constantly running errands. And the last time I measured my waist was 44 inches around, prepregnancy was 29 so that's quite a difference!

Here is my belly this week on the left is my belly from Saturday and the right is my belly on Sunday. It appears as though she is starting to drop!

<3

Weeks 32 & 33

Holy crap I'm 33 weeks. It's insane actually typing that.

This week baby is as big as a....

Can you believe it folks? As big as a weird looking fruit?

She feels super long recently her feets are always hanging out in my ribs or on my stomach or what I imagine is my stomach. This week she's coordinated her breathing and sucking motions. She also keep her pretty little eyes open when she's awake now. D'awwww.

So week 32 & 33 were full of exhaustion and pain and itching.

Week 32 was pretty great it was a little painful and a lot stressful as it was my second baby shower which was mom and sister funded but I had a crap ton of work to do for it. Thanks to Aud and Katrina we got everything done. But I definitely over did myself on the days leading up to the shower. So I wasn't surprised that the day after the shower I was in a lot of pain and super tired.

That Monday I was pushing through the pain as was expected of me and going on with my normal day to day responsibilities. Tuesday I woke up in worse pain but I figured I just pulled my back out and kept going and going. That is until my body physically wouldn't let me. The pain was getting worse and worse and I finally couldn't even get out of bed. That night was a cycle of me being in pain and tolerating it for about an hour then crying for a half an hour then taking a hot bath then falling asleep for 30 min then starting all over again. My mom came over the next morning to help me with the pets. But being the person I am I still ended up doing my dishes and some straightening even though I was in excruciating pain. I had a 12:30 chiropractic appt that day and could not wait to get some relief from what I thought was maybe me "overdoing it." When Katrina called at 11:30 to ask how I was doing she noticed that I was bawling my eye balls out. So she offered to drive me and after refusing her a few times I finally accepted.

When I got to the chiropractor she wanted me to get my massage first to relieve my pain. Bad idea. It was one of my most painful experiences ever and I literally threw up on the table. Which was incredibly embarrassing. When it came to my adjustment Dr Rose felt how cold and shaky I was. She also noticed I was pale and texted my midwife. And they decided I should go to the hospital.

I am so thankful that someone recognized that I was seriously ill. I guess I got so used to pushing through the pain and brushing it off. So sick of annoying people with my complaints and questions that I ignored my own body and kept pushing through. Because hey I'm pregnant but all pregnant people deal with this so shut up and stop complaining and just do what has to be done. I had apparently lost the ability to advocate for myself.

I got wheeled up to triage and the first thing the nurse told me was, "I hate to break it to you, but back pain is a normal part of pregnancy. I had it, you have it and so does every other pregnant person ever." I listened to her tell me techniques to ease the "normal" back pain of pregnancy... And then there came the strong mama lion that had been pushed away by so many, too many dismissals by so many people who I don't even care about. "Excuse me I don't think you quite understand me. This pain is at a 9 or a 10. I may seem calm and collected because I am good about pain but on the inside I am in so much pain I can not stand it. And by the way have any of you even spoken to my Dr? The person who sent me here in the first place? Clearly she thinks that something serious is going on and I'm not just here because this is where I choose to spend my evenings." The nurse did not say anything again until she took my temp and realized that I had a 101.2 fever and that my heart rate was 150 and the baby's was 180+. "Oh looks like you and baby are tacky and have a fever. Maybe there is something going on here," she said and I wanted to punch her in her stupid bitch face.

I was admitted and didn't have to deal with that bitch again thankfully. The actual birthing staff was amazing and helpful and caring. But boy do those triage nurses suck. I mean really really suck.

Turned out I had a kidney infection. Which means that I also had a UTI for quite sometime that went unnoticed because I began to tell myself everything was normal normal normal. Because I let the opinions of others interfere with my well being, which I don't plan on doing again. So after 2 nights at the hospital I was released and sent home with antibiotics to finish up.

Moral of the story: fuck other people's opinions if you feel like something isn't right then something probably isn't right. And also that I need to slow down. I need to take care of myself and my baby girl better. It is extremely hard because Nick works soooo much and it sucks sooo bad that adding on extra for him to do when he comes home is horrible. My mom has been helping more which is amazing and I really appreciate but I have a really hard time excepting help. I feel like such a burden these days and I know it's not going to get any easier any time soon.

Despite all of the bad this week I am still thankful for my life. I have an amazing husband, a few totally awesome friends, a set of parents who want to see me happy, the most incredible sister to ever grace the planet and... The most important thing in my world, my growing happy active baby girl.

Some good moments...

Me and baby enjoyed the most delectable treat in the world together. 

Thinking about baby Arya and soon to be her best friend <3

Belly Pictures....

week 32

week 32

week 33

week 33

<3

24 weeks pregnant

This week I'm 24 weeks pregnant! Baby girl is as big as a....

I had a "bonus" ultrasound on Wednesday. Her estimated weight was 1lb 5oz and everything looked perfect and healthy. Yay! My sister came with me because Nick had to work. I'm really excited she got to see her niece. Again the ultrasound tech pretty much sucked but we did get a look at her adorable face.

She must have been feeling pretty spunky that day. She kicked the fetal Doppler a ton which was really cute, she's definitely got a personality already! She tends not to like things in her space when the cats/dog lay on my tummy even a little bit she kicks at them.

This week she's starting to develop capillaries which make her skin look more pink and less translucent and her lungs are beginning to become more functional. In the next few weeks she'll practice breathing through her nostrils.

It seems like she's becoming more aware of the sounds around her. She always reacts to Nick's voice when she hears him she starts moving around it super cute.

I've been having way more cravings lately! This week cheese was a big craving as well as fruit and chocolate. Watermelon has been a big hit with me this summer and I've never been a big fan of it before.

Symptoms haven't been too bad this week. I've been working through the pelvic pain and I have a chiropractic appointment this upcoming week. My feet have been getting swollen and I've been really tired lately, but nothing too inconvenient.

Now that I'm not working I'm going to make an effort to make it to the gym 3 times a week. I went today and it was great getting my sweat on. As far as my nightly "workout" routine goes I've only done it a few times this week because I've just been so exhausted. But here is what I generally do.....

My Pregnancy Fitness Routine


No signs of stretch marks yet! My total pregnancy weight gain so far is 13.4 lbs. One of the hardest things about this week has been accepting the fact that I am going to gain quite a bit of weight. I haven't felt very good about myself lately. Don't get me wrong I love my belly and I'm happy to be the vessel for my daughter to grow in. But it is hard. Every day I notice things getting bigger all over. I'm staying active and eating right most of the time. I feel like I'm doing good but I'm starting to figure out the gain is inevitable. You have to gain some weight to have a healthy pregnancy. Every woman and pregnancy is different and if I am one of those pregnant women who end up with the swollen bloated everything and the big puffy round face I need to just be okay with it. It's rough for me, but I'm getting there.

<3

23 weeks pregnant.

I'm 23 weeks pregnant! There's not that much time left before little one gets here! And she's getting big and strong in there! She's now as big as a...

And my uterus is now as big as a soccer ball! Woah!

This week my biggest symptoms have not been very fun. I started having leg cramps in the night :( Thankfully I'm so used to having them normally that I can usually react quickly and prevent them but right now the muscles in my calves are soo tight it's uncomfortable pretty much all of the time. Symptom number two is extreme pelvic and hip pain! I've always had issues with my hips when I'm really active so that doesn't surprise me it's the pelvic pain that's really freaking me out. I don't know if it's normal to experience it this intensely this early but thankfully I have a Drs appointment this upcoming Wednesday where I can ask her about it and possibly set up an appointment with a chiropractor.

This week we got our crib set! I am so excited! I absolutely love this set. It's just pretty without being overly girly. The last thing I want is for my baby girl to be bombarded with a ton of pink frilly shit all over the place every day of her life and I think I've been successful in avoiding just that.

I'm still doing my exercises most nights of the week. I've also been reading "Natural Childbirth for Dummies" and I've incorporated some new moves that are supposed to help prepare me for labor. I think I'm going to post my workout routine on the next blog for any other interested preggos. No signs of stretch marks yet and I'm still using my Angel Baby Earth Mama Natural Stretch oil which I've been using every night since I was about 6 weeks pregnant. I'm now up to 11.7 lbs in total weight gain. I was retaining a lot of water up until today but now I seem to be pretty much back to normal.

Here are my belly shots this week. The first 2 are what I get when I ask my husband to stop what he's doing and take belly shots of me. The next 2 are my mirror shots and now you know why most the time I just do mirror shots ;)

<3

That's it! I've had enough! I quit!

Smoking has been something that I love to do for years now. There's nothing like the feeling of smoking a cigarette after a filling meal, sipping a latte, or taking that first sip of a beer after a long hard days work (I should be in advertising). Or if your me... Whenever your in the car, whenever someone calls, when you wake up in the morning. when you go to sleep at night, when you just found out some great news, when something really shitty just happened, or nothing happened and your just bored and don't have anything better.

I say no more! I'm calling bullshit on you Camel Lights! Yes you are soo delightful on most all of those occasions. Yes you were a symbol of my independence from an abusive relationship. Yes you've been through all of the good and bad times with me. There with me at my deepest darkest moments as well as joyful celebrations.

I have fooled myself into believing that I not only need cigarettes, I want them. After starting Bikram, straightening out my eating habits, as well as my life, I've realized something. I am strong and smart and beautiful and I have no greater desire than to live and be happy. I see so many life paths and options on the horizon and I really don't want my smokes to come with me.

For 5 years we've been bffs. But friends don't try to kill other friends.

I'm sure we'll meet on occasion through different points in my life. But I'm letting you go and taking back control.